Oh, the Religion. Oh, the Rant.

I've been thinking a lot about sin.

(And yes, this is going to be a religion-heavy post. If that makes you uncomfortable, you can leave, you have that right. But remember, grasshopper, that which challenges us makes us stronger. Maybe you'll learn something. Maybe you'll disagree. As a matter of fact, I like arguments! Leave me a cranky comment and I'll have a ball.)

So yes, sin. That word doesn't get used much today. You'll never see it reported in the media, and very rarely does the typical pastor use it from the pulpit. It's an uncomfortable word, a hush-hush sort of word. People today, even Christians, don't want to admit to failings. They don't want to admit weakness, an inherent need for rescue.

And don't even think about suggesting that there is one truth and only one truth. You'll get crucified. (Pun intended.)

Our church, the Orthodox Church, talks about sin a lot. As in, "Of sinners, I am chief." Every time we get together for the liturgy, we chant portions that outline our sin, our unworthiness, our inestimable need for God's forgiveness and holiness. We don't go so far as to lament our chains to sin; we believe we can be forever freed from sin, which is holiness. But we definitely use the liturgy to relate our human, depraved condition. Stephen and I try to take these words seriously, although you might like to know that the majority of the time we're fielding crayon-on-pew accidents, cranky, hiccup-prone babies, and Baylor-going-limp-and-screaming-for-no-reason episodes.

We try, we really do.

Anyway, for anyone who cares, I'm sick of it. Not of our church--I think they have it right. I'll go so far as to say I know they have it right. What I'm sick of is the post-modern world view that says something mamby-pamby like, "Oh, we all have our own paths to truth. God is here to comfort us. He wants to offer healing. And however you find Him is okay."

[Insert frustrated snort.]

I really doubt Jesus came to Earth in human form, commanded us to repent multiple times, and allowed Himself to be put to death through the most agonizing, horrible means possible all to offer us happy, peace-filled clouds of comfort. He came to give us a way out of our depravity, but we have to be willing to look that depravity (at least what of it we are able to see and handle, because, after all, we aren't fully like God yet), see it for what it is, fall on our faces, and repent of it. Over and over, repent. That is why He came.

Maybe I'm rambling. In case this is happening, let me offer you some words by Frederica Matthewes-Green, one of my favorite Christian authors. These snippets are taken from her book The Illumined Heart:

"Talk about repentance makes modern-day Christians nervous. We are embarrassed by the stereotype of old-fashioned preachers hammering on sin and making people feel guilty. We rush to assert that Jesus isn't really like that, he came out of love, he wants to help us. He knows us deep inside and feels our every pain, and his healing love sets us free.

"This is one of those truths that runs out of gas halfway home. The question is, what do we need to be healed of? Subjectively, we think we need sympathy and comfort, because our felt experience is of loneliness and unease. Objectively, our hearts are eaten through with rottenness. A hug and a smile aren't enough...

"[Repentance] is not condemnation, but right diagnosis. It is not judgmentalism, because the judgment is evenly applied: All are sinners, all have fallen short. It is not false guilt, because a lot of the guilt we feel is in fact deserved; we are guilty. Forgiveness of past sins doesn't cure the sickness in the heart that continues to yearn after more. We will remain sick until that healing begins, and it will be a lifelong process.

"What a relief it is to admit this. Like the woman weeping at Jesus' feet, we have nothing more to conceal, no more self-justification, no more self-pity. We are fully known, even in the depths that we ourselves cannot see, cannot bear to see. Instead of hoping that God will love us for our good parts and pass over the rest, we know that he died for the bad parts, and will not rest until they are made right. The depth of our sin proves the height of his love, a height we cannot comprehend until we realize how desperately we need it. We are fully loved, and one day will be fully healed, brought into God's presence without spot or wrinkle or anything."

She speaks the truth. This is the truth. This is our humanly pursuit after heavenly holiness. There is no way around it.

I guess why I am so ticked off lately is that I'm sick of emotional Christianity. I'm sick of being fed the lie that it's all about how I feel day-to-day, how I perceive Christ's comfort, I, I, I, me, me, me. I know many people, many women in particular (and don't get politically correct on me, because people, it's true--it's just how the sexes are built) find a lot of meaning in the emotional aspect of Christianity. And the truth is, it's not always, if often, going to feel warm and fuzzy. And it's not always, if often, about how you feel. It's all about Christ. I have not chosen Christ; He has chosen me.

And if the only way I define my Christianity is through emotions, meaningless, transient, fickle emotions, then my faith is as shaky and unstable as the house built upon the sand (see Matthew 7:26).

I think I'm done for now. I think that rant was enough for awhile. Leave a comment expressing your feelings (ha! feelings!) on the matter, in agreement or otherwise. Remember, I am one of those people who thrives on conflict. If everyone just happily agrees, I will not be happy.

And we like this corner of the internet to remain happy, don't we?